This is inspired by a topic on a friend’s site. The vivacious Vanessa has a style blog called Big Girl, Small Budget. She is a beautiful girl (I reserve the right to refer to her as a girl, she’s younger than me …. so there), with a wonderful sense of style. By all counts she is a lot more out there and daring than I am, but I find her an inspiration. Now some visitor to her blog, chose to place a negative comment in her blog, berating her for her choice, as she is apparently “showing unflattering parts of her body”. Now, being a sort of rubber band christian, I am a big believer in the whole “made by and loved by god” and so therefore to me all parts of the body are beautiful, and I found this comment offensive.
But it got me thinking ….. what exactly is a blog to you? To me its like a part of my home, a personal space where I let my hair down, reveal little bits of me, and be honest to myself, even if I have a mask out there for the real world. The people who visit my blog, and like visitors to my home …… I welcome them in, and they are free to voice their opinions …. but they are visitors, and I expect a standard of behaviour and language from them. This is my space, and I decide the tone.
But many people view blogs as sort of a public noticeboard ….. you may own the board, but the visitors can do and say what they like, without impunity. Or maybe a TV show ….. where the visitor expects that only the best and prettiest get to be on show, and all the (supposedly) ugly bits stay hidden.
Or maybe a school ….. where only the best matter, and rules are insurmountable.
Its been a long day, and that can inspire deep and meaningful ……. I am like that.
First, I’m glad that I could provide some inspiration for a post! Secondly, I’ve also thought long and hard about the role of a blog. It stings when I receive a comment that’s mean or unhelpful. I can’t lie and say it doesn’t. And, I do wonder why people bother to come to a blog and read it and post mean-spirited comments. If they don’t like what they see, there are thousands of other fashion blogs (or any other genre of blog) to choose from.
On the other hand, I fully understand that once I put something out there in the world, it is out there. And, I’d much rather have a free and honest conversation with readers than only receive insincere pleasantries. I guess, I’m hoping to cultivate something inbetween a personal “home” space and a message board. Something where one is free to say what they want, but with a little decorum.
Thanks for your kind comments on this topic on my blog. I really appreciate it!
I liken a blog to an office or a living room. It’s a place where you receive clients or visitors. In that way, it’s a public space, and therefore, certain things such as nakedness, nose picking or farting are not recommended.
However, it is still your own territory, and within society’s normal rules for public spaces, one can do as one likes.
Also, more to the point, just because someone has an opinion about something you chose to post, doesn’t mean that opinion is the be all and end all. I mean, a decorator may see my home as a nightmare, but to us, it is comfortable and utilitarian for our own personal needs.
When I visit a blog, I try to consider that I am in another’s territory, and that they’ve kindly invited me there by making their blog public, but that I should not abuse that invitation. I’ll express my opinion, but in the kindest, politest ways possible.
Welcome to my space Catherine, you are very welcome in my living room.