The longer it is, the harder it is to imagine what might have been.  Isabeau would have been 9 years old this year.  I try to imagine my tiny little girl as a 9 year old, and all I see is a darker haired version of Naomi. Maybe that would have been her, who knows.
Thinking of her still leaves an ache in my heart. Why do I have to carry this pain? Surely the shitty childhood, and crappy parents was enough …. why did I have to lose my child as well?
Happy birthday Isabeau …… Mummy misses you.
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